Although your pelvic floor muscle contractions play a role in orgasm, there is so much more at play than just the contraction of these muscles. Sexual function involves your whole body and mind. In the book we explore the connection between the brain and female genitals, and have a number of practices to strengthen this connection to help amplify the strength of orgasms. For the purpose of this page, we will focus on the recipe for climax and the female genitals from a sexual perspective.
The main ingredients in the recipe for climax are desire, arousal, and stimulation. Desire typically comes first, but not always. Maybe you can remember a time when you weren’t in the mood, but your partner did or said things to increased your desire creating arousal. Maybe your partner used stimulation to create arousal causing your desire to increase. Regardless of the route taken, if desire, arousal and stimulation are all present, you have the core ingredients to cook up an orgasm.
As the proceedings get underway, there are changes throughout the body. Heart rate and blood pressure increase. Pupils in the eyes dilate. Breasts swell up with the nipples becoming more sensitive and erect. The cheeks might flush. The blood supply to the vagina and cervix increases and the uterus can shift position, tipping downwards ready to welcome an inflow of sperm. Persistent stimulation of the clitoris (external) can in itself produce an orgasm, in fact, a 2018 US study into women’s experiences with genital touching, sexual pleasure and orgasm found that 36.6% of women reported clitoral stimulation was necessary for orgasm during intercourse. A further 36% reported having better orgasms if the clitoris was stimulated during intercourse.
The mechanism for touch, including location, pressure, pattern and rhythm is quite diverse between women. A wonderful website exploring the science behind orgasm was launched in 2016. OMGYes is an online tool to help you to increase the strength of your orgasms. Understanding what works for you is pivotal to successful orgasm. A 2016 study found that for women, “partnered sex of good quality seems to promote cardiovascular health, specifically reducing the risks of hypertension“. What better reason to find a nurturing relationship where you are sexually satisfied?!
The quality of your sexual experience is very subjective. If you consistently fail to achieve orgasm during your encounters, you may report feeling unsatisfied. On the other hand, you may have really enjoyed the experience and feel no dissatisfaction on having failed to “cross the line”. Your thoughts are influenced by the hormones that radiate through your body. Hormones play a major role in the sexual response cycle, where you go through phases of arousal, plateau of excitement, orgasm and resolution (the return of everything to normal following climax). The relationship with your partner (or yourself if you are masturbating) also has an impact on your sexual satisfaction. Your thoughts in their subjectivity have the ability to make your experience positive or negative. This is something we explore at length in the book.